A Positive Note

I did however have some support from some old friends of mine. I did think that these people had abandoned me and forgotten I existed because of my reversion. However this past week I received a facebook message from one of them asking why they hadn't heard from me and that they supported me no matter what and that they still loved me. I thought it was very surprising and it was heart warming. This weekend another old friend came and visited, and we discussed some things...catching up like nothing had happened. I was unconsciously avoiding them because I felt that they were rejected me for my changed religion and habits ( they drink/club/date etc...) and I just never asked the golden question, "Are we still friends?" I feel that one of my weaknesses is to avoid uncomfortable confrontations like that, and just avoid them. I feel regret towards this because apparently they were slightly offended I hadn't updated them about what was going on..I urge anyone who is reverting to Islam to confront the issue with people directly;they could surprise you. I really feel like we missed a lot of time because of this avoidance. I have known these people for 12 years, and I thought they would stop talking to me because I bettered myself???? I am just so stunned and ashamed at my behavior, and frankly a little embarrassed. I don't know why I am avoiding people I grew up with like the plague. I just feel so uncomfortable in hijab in my home town, and in front of people who knew me as a non muslim. I feel like I'm wearing a costume that they can see right through. Please pray that I will overcome this self conscious issue.

Salaam,

Katie